I've just started seeing someone and I'm finding it so hard to cope with?

Be kind to yourself and accept who you are right now. Notice how your breathing changes, if only for a few seconds you'll notice a sigh of relief. We all want relief what is bothering us so we can make up our minds and move forward. All easier said than done as it sounds too simple. If you feel you're getting worse while seeing your therapist then this maybe an indication that the therapist isn't suitable for you. You can look for another therapist. If your not comfortable with intimacy right now this could be the reason you don't feel you want to get intimate (into myself I see) with the "nice guy". You connect with this guy and you probably know that you'll have to face true intimacy with him which you might not be ready for. The other guy may feel less of a threat to you having to face what's bothering you so intuitively you go for him even though you know he's a womaniser (the easy option so to speak). Drinking is only going to be temporary relief. Be gently with yourself. Take care.